By Christian Cintron, Hollywood Staff
This episode was all about one thing ... negativity. It seems like everyone is throwing it out into the universe. And what do we get when we put negativity out in the universe ... we get shade.
The episode begins with Phaedra Parks visiting Kandi Burruss to discuss her trip to Athens. She and Kandi bond over having slept with the same small-penised man and delight in being more successful than Chuck Smith. Speaking of failed relationships, it looks like Kandi's current man Todd Tucker is completely comfortable abandoning their failed musical for an international job. Six months is a long time to leave your partner if you plan on going into business with the and are planning a wedding. Suddenly, the craziest thought of the season ... what if Momma Joyce is right? Maybe her crazy is a smokescreen for A Beautiful Mind kind of genius. There are probably equations written all over her bedroom in Kandi's old house.
Cynthia Bailey continues her game of Russian Roulette house with her sister Malorie Mal Massie staying for two months. She starts looking at her bead designs ... because what's the best business to start in a recession, high-end beaded bracelets. Apparently, smart business decisions don't run in the family. Peter Thomas shows up and the conversation degrades into a fight about sex. The scariest part is that Cynthia thinks she is responsible for Peter giving her a physical verbal lashing last episode. As his wife, she's justified in questioning his business decisions. She also shouldn't have to talk about getting freaky in front of her sister. After all, this is Bravo not Playboy Channel. Coincidentally, the Real Housewives of Boob Island are going through similar issues.
Kenya Moore unwittingly invites herself into everyone's heart when she invites her overly critical and verbally abusive father to stay with her. Her dad shows up like a horrible actor playing a character from Texas. He then proceeds to insult everything about Kenya from her feet to her house to her life choices. Doesn't he realize this is going to air on television? And suddenly, Kenya's constant need for attention and validation makes sense. NeNe Leakes and Cynthia stop by Kenya's house to witness Kenya's father's horrible misogyny and disrespect. Then Kenya calls out NeNe on not wanting to star in Kandi's play. NeNe replies, "I just got finished starring in a Ryan Murphy production ... should I really be starring in a Kandi Burruss production?"
Meanwhile, on Stupidity Island, Porsha Stewart is still expecting a huge payout for her short marriage to Kordell Stewart. Their possible reconciliation seemed like a ratings ploy because Kordell hasn't once appeared on the show and I'm not sure anyone could forgive her repeated claims that he's gay. Her lawyers had to explain that they will need to be paid. In more financial issue news, she invites Phaedra and Kandi over to see her huge house. Considering the lack of fixtures and furniture, Phaedra asks if leasing such a house is a good idea. If the walls in her house could talk they'd scream, "Why don't you have furniture, crazy?!?" Porsha responds that the house is inspirational. People get inspired by art but they don't buy museums.
Cynthia has a tired trunk show for Mal's hardware jewelry design. Kenya jokingly points out Mal's rudeness with her unannounced two month visit to which Mal responds with some major shade. Mynique Smith, spelling champion, appears and is ignored by both Phaedra and Kandi. Everyone discusses how close Porsha's new house is to NeNe. NeNe begins yelling at Porsha for being a bad friend which makes Porsha cry for the 150oth time this season. Kenya, in a moment of lucidity, says what we're all thinking, "Is she still crying about her divorce?" She storms out and twirls in front of a car across the street. NeNe apologizes to a tear covered Porsha. Then Porsha officially made the last reference to her divorce before all of America collectively agrees to fast forward through her stories in the future.